Everything's So Bitch!

My view is pro-existance. ~ils veulent juste baiser~

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It's a good thing they didn't get us barbies. Toys like those are just unwholesome.
If there's actually anyone out there that reads this that doesn't know yet, I was accepted as an alternate for the Jet Program. So if enough people turn down/quit the job some time from now till the end of December, I may be asked to replace it. Bleh, almost worse than getting a 'no.' Supposedly they're pretty good at guessing the number of alternates they'll need and most eventually get offered the job at some point. But I'm a pessimist who does not find much encouragement in neither that nor the likelihood of the number of people who usually turn down the job staying the same considering the current zombie apocalypse.

In other news, long before the days of The Rotten Lettuce (a recorded play in which a late elementary school-aged Brother and I with three of our friends from the neighborhood acted out a mostly nonsensical story which eventually climaxed in the marriage and make-out session of two elderly same-sex couples.), Brother and I played extensively in the world of Ponyland, a rich, complex landscape which you can see some of the fascinating details of through these bits of conversation.

Carl Kitchen: got that my little pony thing you sent me
Carl Kitchen: it was funny
Nora Kitchen: i don't think they explore the idea as thoroughly as they could
Nora Kitchen: but it was a promising idea
Carl Kitchen: yeah, i could go much more in depth
Carl Kitchen: i want to write a serious scholarly paper on it
Carl Kitchen: and that episode with the big brothers still bothers me
Carl Kitchen: where were they, why do they leave, what is there relationship with the ponies
Carl Kitchen: the ponies seem to be so excited that they're coming back
Nora Kitchen: i think i had a vague idea it was kind of like this....sailor/fishermen like situation
Carl Kitchen: for some reason when i was a kid, i assumed it was a war.
Nora Kitchen: lol
Carl Kitchen: i think the gulf war was just starting.
Nora Kitchen: you were always so much more violent
Nora Kitchen: my little ponies in the gulf war
Carl Kitchen: or at least they were talking a lot about how their might be a war, i'm not really sure.
Carl Kitchen: because i don't think the gulf war started until i was in 2nd grade.
Carl Kitchen: i always thought OUR pony world was much more natural.
Carl Kitchen: and realistic.
Carl Kitchen: even with the implied incest.
Carl Kitchen: i don't think i ever thought of it as incest. both pairs had the same parents, but i didn't think of them as brothers and sisters.
Carl Kitchen: maybe we were acting out our secret incestuous fantasies through our ponies.
Nora Kitchen: yeah, well, they all must have been little princes and princesses since their mom and dad were the king and queen, right?
Nora Kitchen: royal incest is a lot more normal
Carl Kitchen: true, lol.
Carl Kitchen: i wish mom and dad had asked us about their kinship ties.
Carl Kitchen: i think in the end, willyee and barnacle ended up marrying them [Featherdust and Firefly, their sisters].
Carl Kitchen: buttercup was an exotic fling.
Carl Kitchen: and turned out to be a crazy bitch too. even though originally, she was much more beautiful and elegant.
Carl Kitchen: and cool.
Nora Kitchen: she wasn't their sister, right?
Carl Kitchen: she could've been. i don't think we were ever really clear on that.
Nora Kitchen: i could see her being an illegitimate child
Carl Kitchen: she will probably end up going off on her own, meeting salty, and marrying him.
Carl Kitchen: i like how we added majesty, but it was never really clear if she was above or below [king and queen] lightning and firefun in the pony hierarchy
Carl Kitchen: i like to think that she was above
Carl Kitchen: spiritually
Carl Kitchen: lightning was the political ruler
Nora Kitchen: yeah, that was the impression i had, too
Carl Kitchen: we should've killed ponies off once in a while to keep it exciting.
Carl Kitchen: but say there was a pony we no longer thought we would play with. we could just kill it off and put it away forever.
Carl Kitchen: like meriweather, i like to think she effectively died.
Carl Kitchen: even though she was there from the beginning.
Carl Kitchen: with gusty. [Gusty and Meriwether were our first My Little Ponies which parents gave to us for Christmas.]
Carl Kitchen: who also died, i like to think.
Nora Kitchen: was gusty a lesbian?
Carl Kitchen: they weren't characters you could identify with.
Nora Kitchen: cause surely meriweather was
Carl Kitchen: gusty was transgender.
Carl Kitchen: born a girl, but identified as male.
Carl Kitchen: the two were obviously too ahead of their time.
Carl Kitchen: so they got kicked off to make room for a more wholesome teen drama.

...Of course, that one time where the ponies went back in time and got magically turned into babies by some sorcerer and the only way they even got back was because they devolved into embryos and then got implanted into Featherdust's stomach so she could rebirth the entire pony kingdom kind of complicates the family relations even worse.

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Hahahaha, wooooow! There are bits of that I'd never heard before. For example, Featherdust rebirthing the entire pony kingdom. Fabulous.

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